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《老友记》学口语（每日更新）：本视频截取自《老友记》第五季16集。
口语训练贵在坚持哦，相信在Friends的陪伴下，口语会有显著的提高！
老友原文：
Joey:(entering) Hey!
Rachel: Hey! How’s it going? Did you make any new friends?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, I met this woman. (Starts for his room.)
Chandler: (stopping him) Hey, whoa-whoa! What’s she like?
Joey: Uhh, well, she’s…really good in bed.
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
Joey: (To Rachel) Well look, hey, it’s all your fault!
Rachel: What?! Why?!
Joey: Well because you didn’t give me advice! No! You gave me a pickup line! As soon as I told her I wanted to y’know, build a foundation and be friends first. I suddenly, through no fault of my own, became irresistible to her! (Pause) And her roommate!
Monica: What about the closeness?
Joey: Closeness-shmoshness! There was three of us for crying out loud!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, Joey is entering with a pizza and finds everyone but Ross there.]
Joey: (entering) All right! Hey, who wants pizza?!
Chandler: Ooh, I do! I do! I do!
(They all walk over to get a slice.)
Joey: (taking a bite) Oh, great! Can you believe I found it on the second floor?
(They all throw their pieces back as there is a knock on the door.)
Monica: Who is it?
Voice: N.Y.P.D!!
Phoebe and Joey: Oh my God!
Joey: Uhh, just a minute officer!!
(He throws his piece back in the box, runs into the living room, looks for a place to hide the pizza, finds one, slides the box under the couch, sits down on the table, and tries to quickly chew the food in his mouth.)
Cop: I’m looking for Phoebe Buffay!
Phoebe: Ooh, God, it’s him! It’s that cop! God, I can’t believe it! He found me!
Rachel: Oh my God, Phoebe, are you gonna go to jail?!
Phoebe: Well, if I’m going down, I’m taking you (Points at all of them) with me. (They all look at her.) Harboring a fugitive? That’s one to three years minimum. Good luck Chandler. (She opens the door to the cop from before.) Okay, you can arrest me. Fine. But you’ll never make it stick and you know it!
Cop: Yeah, but I kinda don’t have a choice, it’s my job. I mean, you understand right?
Phoebe: Yep! As long as you understand that I’m going to call my lawyer and once he puts you on the stand he’ll make you look like a fool. A fool!
Cop: I don’t like looking foolish. Y’know what? Maybe uh, I don’t arrest you today. Maybe I came by and you weren’t here.
Phoebe: I would love it if I weren’t here!
Cop: Okay, so since umm, you’re not going to jail tonight I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me?
Phoebe: Me?!
Cop: Yeah. Ever since you flashed my badge at me, I kinda can’t stop thinking about you. You’re the prettiest, fake undercover whore I’ve ever seen.
Chandler and Joey: Nice!
Phoebe: Wow! I didn’t see that coming! You’re-you’re asking me out!
Cop: Yeah. I mean, I coulda done it better, but these people keep staring at me.
Phoebe: Umm, yeah, I’d like to go out with you officer…
Cop: Gary.
Phoebe: Gary.
Gary: Okay, so it’s a date.
Phoebe: Yeah! So--ooh, I gotta ask you though. How did you know where to find me?
Gary: Well you’re fingerprints were all over my badge so I just ran it through the computer and this was listed as your last known address so I just checked it out.
Phoebe: Ohh, impressive.
Gary: Not as impressive as you. I gotta tell you, I looked at your record and you’ve done some pretty weird stuff.
Phoebe: Yeah, we’ll talk at dinner.
Gary: Okay. (He starts to leave.) So I’ll come by in a couple hours and pick you up?
Phoebe: All right, I can’t wait!
Gary: Okay. And don’t worry, I’m not just gonna take you out for donuts.
(Chandler busts out laughing and everyone just looks at him.)
Chandler: (To Rachel) He has a gun!
Closing Credits
[Scene: The couch store, Ross is talking to a saleswoman.]
Ross: I’d like to return this couch. I’m not satisfied with it.
[The camera cuts to show the couch, which has been cut in half.]
The Saleswoman: You wanna return this couch? (Ross nods yes.) It’s cut in half!
Ross: That’s what I’m telling you.
The Saleswoman: Did you cut this couch in half?
Ross: This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half!
The Saleswoman: You’re telling me this couch was delivered to you like this?!
Ross: Look, I am a reasonable man. I will accept store credit.
The Saleswoman: I’ll give you store credit in the amount of four dollars.
Ross: (thinks) I take it.
老友译文：
进展如何？交到朋友吗？
碰到这个女人
她怎么样?
她
床上很厉害
不是说好先交朋友吗？
那都是你的错
为什么?
你不教我学好
却教我泡妞用语
我刚跟她说了要
”先建立感情基础、只做朋友”
她马上就要我
这可不是我的错
她室友也有同感！
那亲密关系怎么办？
亲密!我们三个都渴望亲密！
谁要比萨?
我要！我要！
不敢相信吧？我在二楼捡的
谁？
纽约警察
喔，我的天
等一下，长官
我找菲比布菲
天,是那个条子
他居然能找到我
你会坐牢吗?
如果我被关起来，
我要拖你们全部下水！
窝藏逃犯? 最少判一到三年
祝你好运，钱德
逮捕我吧，但你不能给我定罪
我没办法，这是我的职责
你能理解，对吧?
你也能理解吧，我要找律师
一旦他让你出庭，就能搞臭你!
我可不想被搞臭
我今天放你一马罢，就当我来了，你却不在
好主意
既然你今晚不用入狱，能不能
陪我去吃个饭?
我吗?
自从你亮出我的*徽警**，
我就一直挂念你
你是我见过的最漂亮的假便衣
很好
哇，我不知道你在约我
这是约会！
我本可以不让你受惊
但他们老瞪着我
我愿意跟你约会，长官
盖瑞
盖瑞
好，我们在约会
对了，你怎么找到我的?
*徽警**上满是你的指纹，我输入电脑
找到你最近的住址,所以来这里找你
哦,真不寻常
比不上你的不寻常
我查了你的记录，你经历颇丰富
饭桌上谈
好,过几个小时我来接你
迫不及待！
别怕，我不会只带你去吃免费甜甜圈
他有枪的！（你们还不笑？）
我想退货，我对它不满意
你要退货?
它都身首异处了！
所以才退货
是你把它一分为二的吗？
这张沙发断成两截了！我要换一张完整的
你是说提货时它就这么惨?
我是个讲道理的人
你们店的抵用券我也收的
好，我给你抵用券，
4元
我收下了
END