爱吃辣的加拿大大叔
雅思托福10多年一线教学
中文说得还不错，头像是他家猫
在这里分享他原创的雅思写作干货
每篇范文都有配音，在同名公众号“英语考试Cat”
你好呀，我是来自加拿大的雅思外教Mac。 今天，给大家带来一个 雅思大作文 的高分范文。
老规矩，以下是正文目录：
1，题目
2，审题
3，高分范文
4，范文朗读
5，范文地道词汇中英对照，包括：
- 题目改述
- 报告类大作文高分句型
- 展示“词汇丰富度”的词汇&短语
- 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇&句型
上题：
An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?
审题：
- Type: Advantages and disadvantages (report style 报告类)
- Body 1: convenience and saves time
- Body 2: encourages a sedentary lifestyle and has a negative effect on local business.
- Model Answer 高分范文 & 范文朗读 -
▲范文音频戳这里▲
A growing phenomenon within the population is that of Internet shopping. This essay shall explore both the benefits and drawbacks of this situation.
One of the clearest advantages of online shopping is that of convenience. By being able to simply scroll on the smart phone to locate a product desired, and by a press of a button, making the order for the product, consumers can shop without leaving the home. In many cases, the product will be delivered directly to their home address, so there is even no need to leave the home to collect the product. This is the very definition of convenience. Shopping online, thus, not just brings great convenience to people’s lives, but also saves people a great amount of time, as before, hours would have to be spent commuting, finding the product, and returning home.
The major drawback to being able to shop on the Internet is that it adds to people’s sedentary lifestyle. In essence, it encourages people to remain in their chair, whether at work or at home, instead of actually physically leaving the home to purchase whatever it is they require. In fact, the necessity of shopping was one of the main avenues of exercise for many people. With online shopping however, this opportunity to move the legs is now quickly disappearing. Somewhat related to this is the negative effect online shopping has on the local economy. Without the need to visit retail outlets within the neighborhood, local businesses suffer with a drop in business from local neighborhood citizens.
In conclusion, the two main benefits online shopping bring to consumers are that of convenience and saving time; however, this convenience can manifest the serious drawback of encouraging a sedentary lifestyle within people, along with causing local businesses to suffer a decline in business.
- Essay Analysis 范文解析 -
- (1) Introduction
Paraphrasing from the Statement/Question 题目改述:
- An increasing = A growing phenomenon
- number of people = within the population
- buying what they need online = Internet shopping
- development = situation
Standard Phrase for the “Report” type essay 报告类大作文高分句型：
- This essay shall explore both the benefits and drawbacks of this situation.
Words showing Cohesion (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:
- This
- this situation
Vocabulary 高分地道词汇和短语：
- phenomenon 现象
- drawbacks 劣势；缺点
- (2) Body 1 -
Aspects that must be referred to 这段需要提到：
- What are the advantages of this situation?
Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型：
- One of the clearest advantages of…is that of
Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语：
- scroll on 滑动
- a press of a button 一键……
- make the order for 下单
- consumers 消费者
- delivered directly to 直接送达
- the very definition of ……的定义
- a great amount of time 大量时间
- commuting 通勤
- returning home 回家
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- that of
- By being able to
- simply
- making (cause and effect gerund)
- In many cases,
- , so there
- even
- This
- , thus
- not just…, but also
- , as before,
- (3) Body 2 -
Aspects that must be referred to 这段需要提到：
- What are the disadvantages of this situation?
Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型：
- The major drawback…is that
Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语：
- sedentary lifestyle 久坐的生活方式
- encourages 鼓励
- to remain in their chair 留在椅子上
- physically leaving 动身离开
- to purchase 购买
- the necessity of ……的必要性
- one of the main avenues of 一种主要的途径
- to move the legs 动动腿
- quickly disappearing 迅速消失
- the local economy 本地经济
- visit retail outlets 零售店
- suffer with…from 遭受……
- citizens 市民
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- it
- In essence,
- their
- whether
- , instead of
- actually
- whatever it is
- they
- In fact,
- With…however,
- this
- Somewhat related to this
- Without
- (4) Conclusion -
Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型：
- In conclusion,
- The two main benefits…are that of
Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语：
- manifest 展现
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- that of
- ; however,
- this
- , along with
- causing
以上就是我今天分享的关于雅思的部分干货，如果你在考雅思，或单纯想提升英语，做1个动作：点击关注我，及时收看更多干货好文。
祝各位早日和雅思分手，加油！